Cocaine isn't habit forming. I should know I've been using it for years.

Let's not quibble! I'm the foe of moderation, the champion of excess. If I may lift a line from a die-hard whose identity is lost in the shuffle, I'd rather be strongly wrong than weakly right..

Never try to teach a pig to sing. It wastes your time and annoys the pig.

Nobody can be exactly like me. Even I have trouble doing it.

Let's not quibble! I'm the foe of moderation, the champion of excess. If I may lift a line from a die-hard whose identity is lost in the shuffle, "I'd rather be strongly wrong than weakly right."

It's the good girls who keep the diaries; the bad girls never have the time.

Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.

I have three phobias which, could I mute them, would make my life as slick as a sonnet, but as dull as ditch water: I hate to go to bed, I hate to get up, and I hate to be alone.

If I had my life to live again. I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner.

It's one of the tragic ironies of the theatre that only one man in it can count on steady work -- the night watchman.